So many funny quotes!

Who doesn't watch "The Simpsons"? Those ppl are stupid... (No, no I don't mean it...) Or do I!??! Hee Hee... Here are some of my fave quotes from "The Simpsons"! Enjoy! (Homer is my personal fave- oh, and Mr. Burns and the comic store guy...)

Homer: “He lied to us through song. I HATE when people do that!”

Homer: “Sure, I might offend a few of the bluenoses with my cockystride and musky odours -- oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called "City Fathers", who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards,and talk about "What's to be done with this Homer Simpson?".”

Homer: "If anyone asks, Marge, you need 24 hour nursing care, Lisa's a clergyman, Maggie's seven people and Bart was wounded in Vietnam."

Mr. Burns: "Smithers... [sniff, sniff] Do you think maybe the... power plant killed those ducks?"
Mr. Smithers: "No 'maybe' about it sir..."
Mr. Brusn: "[Sniff]... excellent."

Homer: "Marge, we're going out! If we don't come back, avenge our deaths!"
Marge: "Okay!”

Homer: “Trying is the first step toward failure."

Patterson: "Sorry I'm late, someone cut the breaks on my car."
Homer: "Well then you should have been early."

Burns: "Homer, I want to be loved."
Homer: "Ah, all right, first, I'll need a couple of beers..."

Homer: "Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is: never try."

Chief Wiggam: "Oh my God! Someone took a bite from the giant rice crispy square! Oh yeah, and the waiter's been brutaly beaten."

Homer: "In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women."

Smithers: "Sir, I'm afraid we have a bad image, people see you as a bit of an ogre."
Mr.Burns: "I ought to club them and eat their bones!"

Sideshow Bob: "Well, if it isn't my arch nemesis, Bart Simpson. And his sister Lisa to whom I'm fairly indifferent."

Bob: "You do know I used to have a... problem with trying to kill people."
Cecil: "Goodness! I had no idea! For you see, I have been on Mars for the past decade, in a cave with my eyes shut, and my fingers in my ears."
Bob: "Touché, Cecil."

Adam: "Hey guys, I just bought a new Springfield spoon for my spoon collection."
Edge: "Oh no, here we go again."
Bono: "How many spoons do you have in your spoon collection now Adam?"
Adam: "10, if it weren't for my spoon collection I think I'd go nuts."
Bono: "Can I see your spoon?"
(Adam gives it Bono, he throws it away)
Adam: "MY SPOON!!!"
(Spoon hits Mr Burns on the head)
Mr Burns: "Wankers!"

Homer: "When the sign says don't feed the bears they mean don't feed the bears."

Marge: "I'll just have a coffee."
Bartender: "Beer it is then."
Marge: "No, coffee."
Bartender: "Be-er."
MArge: "C-O-"
Bartender: "B-E"
Marge: "Oh forget it."

Lisa: "Dad, we did something very bad!"
Homer: "Did you wreck the car?"
Bart: "No."
Homer: "Did you raise the dead?"
Lisa: "Yes."
Homer: "But the car's okay?"
Bart and Lisa: "Uh-huh."
Homer: "All right then."

Drill Sergeant: "Look soldier, you don't like me, and I don't like you."
Homer: "I like you."
Drill Sergeant: "Well, I don't like you."
Homer: "Maybe you'd like me if you got to know me better"

|*Return To Main*|